Choosing a headstone is one of the most personal decisions a family will ever make. It is a permanent tribute — a physical expression of a life lived — and it deserves careful thought. At the same time, the process can feel overwhelming, particularly when you are grieving. This guide is designed to walk you through every consideration, at your own pace, so that you can make a decision you will be proud of for generations to come.
How long after burial can a headstone be installed?
The first thing to understand is that there is no legal requirement to install a headstone within any particular timeframe. Most cemeteries ask that you wait at least three to six months after burial before installing a memorial, to allow the ground to settle. This means you have time to think, to grieve, and to make a considered decision rather than a hurried one. Each council has its own advice and regulations, we can assist with all council regs.
Many families choose to wait a year or more. There is no right or wrong answer — the memorial will be there for a very long time, and it is worth taking the time to get it right.
Step 1: Check Your Cemetery’s Regulations
Before you consider any design details, you need to understand what your cemetery will and will not permit. Every local authority cemetery in the UK has its own regulations governing the size, material, and style of memorials. These regulations exist for safety reasons — to ensure that memorials are stable and do not pose a risk to visitors or staff — and they vary considerably from one cemetery to another.
Key things to check include:
- Maximum height, width, and depth of the memorial
- Permitted materials (some cemeteries restrict certain stone types or colours)
- Whether kerb sets and chippings are permitted in your section
- Whether the grave is in a lawn section (where only certain memorial types are allowed)
- Whether a permit is required before installation (it almost always is)
We handle all permit applications and council liaison as part of our service — you do not need to contact the cemetery yourself unless you wish to. We are familiar with the regulations for every cemetery across South Tyneside, Sunderland, Gateshead, Newcastle, North Tyneside, and Durham as well as all other UK borough councils.
Step 2: Choose Your Stone Type
The material you choose will affect the appearance, durability, and maintenance requirements of the memorial. The most common options are:
Granite Headstones
Granite is by far the most popular choice for modern headstones, and for good reason. It is exceptionally hard and durable, resistant to weathering and staining, and available in a wide range of colours — from classic black and grey through to blue, red, green, and gold. Polished granite has a high-gloss finish that shows inscriptions and artwork to their best advantage and is easy to clean. It is also the most widely permitted material in UK cemeteries.
Marble Headstones
Marble has a softer, more luminous quality than granite and is particularly associated with traditional and religious memorials. White Carrara marble is a classic choice, though it is more porous than granite and requires more maintenance over time. Coloured marbles — including grey, black, and green varieties — are also available and offer a distinctive appearance.
Natural Stone Headstones (Limestone, Sandstone, Slate)
Natural stone memorials have a warmth and character that polished granite cannot replicate. Limestone and sandstone are traditional choices, particularly in older churchyards, though they are more susceptible to weathering than granite. Slate is extremely durable and takes inscriptions beautifully — it is a popular choice for those seeking a more understated, natural aesthetic.
Step 3: Headstone shape and style
The shape of a headstone is largely a matter of personal taste, though it must comply with cemetery regulations. The most common shapes are:
- Lawn headstone— the standard upright memorial, available in a wide range of shapes including flat top, round top, ogee (curved), and scroll top
- Heart— a powerful symbol of love, particularly popular for younger people and children
- Book or scroll— an elegant form that provides generous space for inscriptions and poetry
- Angel or wings— figurative memorials with sculpted detail, often chosen for their spiritual significance
- Cross— a traditional choice for Christian memorials, available in many styles including Celtic and Latin crosses
- Kerb set— a full surround enclosing the grave space, which can be filled with chippings or planted
Step 4: Think About the Inscription
The inscription is often the most personal and most difficult part of the process. It does not need to be long — some of the most moving inscriptions are just a few words. At a minimum, most families include the full name of the deceased, their dates of birth and death, and a short epitaph or verse.
Take your time with the wording. Read it aloud. Consider how it will feel to read it at the graveside in ten or twenty years’ time. Our Inscription Advice page has a comprehensive collection of verses and epitaphs, organised by relationship and faith, to help inspire you.
Headstone Inscription Font and Finish
Inscriptions can be cut in a wide range of fonts, from traditional serif styles to modern sans-serif lettering. The lettering can be left as cut stone, or filled with lead (for a traditional silver appearance), painted in black, white, or gold, or gilded. The choice of font and finish will significantly affect the overall character of the memorial.
Step 5: Consider Additional Features
Beyond the basic shape and inscription, there are many additional features that can personalise a memorial:
- Laser-etched portraits or images (available on polished granite)
- Hand-carved motifs and decorative borders
- Ceramic photographs
- Vases and flower holders
- Chippings within a kerb set
- Additional plaques for subsequent interments
Working With a Memorial Mason
Once you have a sense of what you are looking for, the next step is to speak with a memorial mason. A good mason will listen carefully to your wishes, advise you on what is achievable within your cemetery’s regulations and your budget, and guide you through the design process without pressure.
Always ensure that your mason is BRAMM-registered or a NAMM member. These accreditations confirm that the mason is competent, insured, and approved to work in local authority cemeteries. We are proud to hold both accreditations and to handle every aspect of the process — from design and manufacture through to installation and permit application — on your behalf.
We offer a free, no-obligation consultation and will never pressure you into a decision. When you are ready, we are here. Please get in touch at any time.